I Don't COMPLETELY Hate You
Today was Kami's birthday, so he wanted to avoid everyone as much as possible. Having people be so damn happy and telling him crud like Happy Birthday got on his nerves. So he was chilling in his room when SHE, Demi, just HAD to burst into his room.
"Kami!" she squeeled. "I made you a birthday cake, with Capu's help, of course. This one didn't become part of the bowl, this time!" she said proudly and held up a carrot cake, sloppily iced and a bit crooked.
Kami stared at the cake, then twitched his lips in disgust. "Don't want it."
Oh, don't be like that, have a tast-" Demi started, untill she tripped and the cake flew into the air, landing on Kami's head.
"Um, Kami, remember that contract you sighned? You know, the one that sais you can't kill me?" Demi said nervously.
Kami set down his knife, and walked out of the room, heading for the bathroom.
Moments later, Kami came back into his room, freshly clean.
And stood at the doorway in shock. His room was decorated with balloons, confetti, and a giant banner that read Happy Birthday. It had green bunnies painted on it.
"You like it?" Demi called from behind him. "I thought it would get you in the Birthday spirit!"
Kami grabbed his knife, and started slashing at the banner and popping balloons.
"HEY!" Demi cried. "It's not THAT bad!"
After Kami was done with the destruction, Demi stared at the shreds, teary eyed. "You are SO not going to be invited to my Birthday party!"
"We LIVE together, so I can attend if I want to. But I don't, ever," Kami resonded.
"JERK!" Demi cried, running out of the room.
Finally, Kami sighed, peace and quiet. That is, untill moments later he heard music. He looked outside his window to find a Mexican band, sombreros and all, singing happy birthday. There was also a dude dressed up as a pink bear waving and acting just plain crazy. And of course, the idiot was outside waving rapidly.
"KAMI!" she yelled. "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"
Knives flew through the air and pinned the sombreros on the ground. A knife was sticking out of the top of the bear's costume. Everyone ran screaming, except Demi. She looked pissed.
"Was that necessary?" she yelled.
".........Yes, since idiots don't get the message."
She stormed into the house, and Kami thought he heard her mumbling something about getting him to enjoy his birthday if it killed her. Killing Demi, now THAT would make his day. His life, even.
He relaxed on his bed, reading his favorite book, "100 Ways To Kill A Purple Haired Idiot." An hour actually passed, untill he realised it was quiet. Too quiet.
So quiet he was worried about what the hell Demi was up to this time. He went to her room, and was suprised to find her reading manga.
"What are you up to?" he asked suspiciously. Demi sighed.
"Nothing I do makes you happy. I'm just makin' you stressed, so I figured you would enjoy your Birthday if I left you alone."
Kami turned around, about to head back. "Ah! Wait!" Demi cried. "I almost forgot, I made you a Birthday present!" Kami's rabbit ears started to twitch in annoyance, but he stayed put. Demi rummaged through the piles of manga that lay on the floor, untill she found what she was looking for.
"Here!" she said with a brilliant smile. On her hands laid a home-made plushie of Kami, it even had a little plush knife. "I wasn't sure what you wanted, since last year I already got you a new knife. So I made you this, with love!"
"You see," Demi continued, "I don't COMPLETELY hate you, in fact I enjoy your company. So I wanted to make sure you have a awesome Birthday. But, that was a failure. We just ended up fighting, again."
Kami normally would have destroyed the plush. But, for a reason he didn't know why, he accepted the gift. Though later he was just going to shove it deep into his closet.
As he turned to go, he said something he would regret and agonize over later. "I don't COMPLETELY hate you, either. 1% of me likes you."